i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
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