WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
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