If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
23 People Reveal The Worst Culture Shock They’ve Ever Experienced While Traveling
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
27 People Confess Their Proudest Fap
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?