i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
Randomize