If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
