My pussy is not your playground.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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