I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Randomize
