shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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