Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
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