margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
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