i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
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I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
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I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
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