Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Randomize