What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
How does it feel to date your dad?
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
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