All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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