my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
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