at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
His hands were made for my vagina.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
