She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize