Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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