Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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