There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Randomize
