Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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