Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
