Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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