i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
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