You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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