Texts From Last Night

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  (212): View more from New York

  Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK

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  (212): Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK http://tfl.nu/7q0x
  Replies (3) Good night (1411) Bad night (646)
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  (626): View more from California

  she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo

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  (626): she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo http://tfl.nu/loae
  Replies (18) Good night (10153) Bad night (1492)
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  (530): View more from California

  regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle

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  (530): regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle http://tfl.nu/1njn
  Replies (10) Good night (3506) Bad night (1862)
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  (989): View more from Michigan

  in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.

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  (989): in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea. http://tfl.nu/9a80
  Replies (14) Good night (1213) Bad night (4926)
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?

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  (918): did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat? http://tfl.nu/7nmi
  Replies (7) Good night (1143) Bad night (2524)
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  (985): View more from Louisiana

  Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex

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  (985): Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex http://tfl.nu/n4wf
  Replies (4) Good night (1573) Bad night (810)
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony

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  (720): I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony http://tfl.nu/iwpl
  Replies (6) Good night (954) Bad night (1621)
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  (706): View more from Georgia

  six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.

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  (706): six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot. http://tfl.nu/rrmy
  Replies (6) Good night (1498) Bad night (530)
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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.

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  (484): I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight. http://tfl.nu/pgss
  Replies (5) Good night (1466) Bad night (710)
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  (571): View more from Virginia

  Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero

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  (571): Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero http://tfl.nu/k0h6
  Replies (9) Good night (1576) Bad night (507)
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  (289): View more from Ontario

  Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.

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  (289): Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes. http://tfl.nu/y1u0
  Replies (9) Good night (439) Bad night (1031)
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  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that

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  (774): He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that http://tfl.nu/j7eg
  Replies (1) Good night (719) Bad night (319)
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there

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  (416): I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there http://tfl.nu/n5pg
  Replies (9) Good night (799) Bad night (377)
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover

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  (608): I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover http://tfl.nu/qezu
  Replies (2) Good night (566) Bad night (372)
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  (804): View more from Virginia

  I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.

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  (804): I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center. http://tfl.nu/60kx
  Replies (1) Good night (708) Bad night (222)

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