I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
25 Children of Helicopter Parents Admit The Most Horrible Thing They Were Put Through
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Proof That Kendall Jenner Is The Queen of Cannes
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Randomize
