ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Randomize
