you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
