I accidentally had phone sex last night
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
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