I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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