We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
