Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
I think i peed on brittanys purse
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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