Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
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