May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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