Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
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