she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
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