worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
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