just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
