Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
