I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Randomize
