But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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