all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
