just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Randomize
