their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Randomize
