Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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