Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
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