new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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