Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
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