My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Randomize