who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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