I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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